(This post first appeared on my blog, Content is Queen Blogger)
“I am only one, but I am one. I cannot do everything, but I can do something. And I will not let what I cannot do interfere with what I can do. ” – Edward Everett Hale
You have to learn to set personal boundaries and limits in both your personal and professional life. It’s flattering to be known as a “sweet” and nice person, yes, it may get you somewhere in life, but it may not always make you happy.
I recently attended a retreat, where the theme was “All You Need Is Love”. To some that may sound kind of corny, but we were mainly focusing on self- love and acceptance. Self- love is a very important component of how you live and function.
I also was fortunate to hear Deepak Chopra speak at Roy Thompson Hall this week as well, on the future of well being, and I just read his guide, The Seven Spiritual Laws of Success.
I learned about acceptance and essentially learned why I should stop questioning EVERYTHING.
Here are some lessons from this week:
Lesson #1: The Importance of Standing Up for Yourself
Recently I had a situation at work where I felt I was being taken advantage of and I let it go for about 6 weeks before I really felt the need to say something about it to my boss. Bear in mind, the person taking advantage of me is a very strong personality and I just did not know what to do about it. It wasn’t a situation that I wanted to make public so I did not want to confront this person head on. But the situation was bothering me, so I finally stepped up my game and told my boss how I felt that I was being used and it was wrong, and he took my side and is going to deal with it. Don’t let yourself be taken advantage of – regardless of what the situation is- it is of no benefit to anyone.
Lesson#2: Don’t Ask Why
When something happens and it is something uncalled for, unpleasant or frustrating, we should learn to embrace it as an opportunity to learn, an opportunity to gain experience, or just take it for what it is: an experience. Many people believe “bad things happen in threes”.
Yesterday, I dropped a makeup compact when I was getting ready, and it broke in a funny way, and usually I would be in a panic, thinking, “This is a terrible way to start my day” but instead, I picked it up, realized I could still close it/use it and put it away.
Later at work, the F9 key on my keyboard literally flew off! Instead of being upset, I was entertained.
I was bombarded with phone calls at work and I was becoming very frustrated but then I remembered “Hey it’s Friday and I have a great weekend coming up” and the frustration melted away.
Lesson #3: Embrace Your Fears
If you don’t try, you’ll never know what you are capable of.
I decided to pay a visit to my old office. When I left, I never planned on visiting, or really keeping in touch with anyone except for the few friends who really meant something to me there. It was a toxic environment to me and everything in my house that reminded me of “that place” I had to get rid off.
On Wednesday, I had to go to that building for a meeting and I went into my old office, and was able to say to a few people, and converse and, surprisingly, I WAS FINE! No more hard feelings, No more “I hate this place”….Nothing of the sort.
That’s when you know you’ve grown, you’re over it, you’ve matured, and you’ve arrived.
Lesson #4: Express Yourself
This goes back to Lesson#1. Part of standing up for yourself includes having the ability to stand up for yourself. In relating this post back to previous posts about blogging/business adventures- I can tell you, that if you love yourself, you will only take on clients that YOU know YOU can handle, that respect you and that will appreciate and listen to your advice.
When you have to deal with other service providers, make sure they do the same. They don’t necessarily have to agree with your advice or opinions, but at least they should consider your point of view and not shut you out.
It’s been about 2 years now since I started my business and I feel like I’ve learned so many important lessons already and I know that there are many more to learn.
Which leads me to my final lesson…
Lesson #5: Self Respect
It’s not just about self- love. It’s about respecting YOURSELF.
A long time ago, I wrote in my journal, “don’t self-deprecate, self-appreciate”. I shared this with the other participants of the retreat last weekend, and it resonated well with them.
How true it is. Stop- putting-yourself-down!!
Give the perception of strength, self-love and self-respect and others will do the same towards you.
This applies to the business world too. You want to succeed – send out the right “vibes”.
It’s the law of intention.
Remember, you get what you give….